wee hee hee!!!
today's our third month together.
and it's super funny.
you know?
not as in funny funny, but funny...
ya... funny.

today happened to be our third month together.
not something really big.
but on this day of every month would be darling day!
and we'll be spending time with each other.
on the first month... he surprised me with a super
beautiful pink rose. not forgetting the cost of it and
where it came from.
on the second month... he surprised me again with a
sunflower and brought me to sunset-sunrise.
love that place!
and i thought, since he surprised me on both months,
it's really my turn to show my love.
so today was supposed to be e-learning day.
which means we don't have to go school physically..
but we still have to learn and do assignments through
our online thingy.(whatever shit that is...)
i decided to leave the com as it is and happily went out
wanting to surprise him...
funny shiying went to his corridor and pasted those
stuff on the wall waiting to press funny asri's doorbell
to surprise him.
but when i called funny asri..
he said 'i'm at bishan.'
and i said 'but i'm at your doorstep!'
then he said 'i was gonna surprise you la...'
!(*$&#(@*&^~)!
we both failed our missions today.
and i was really sad.
cos i rushed everywhere for the blue rose.. the
cardboards and everything and even took a cab down.
but i guess he was sad too.
cos he made my favourite asri sandwich!
(actually i feel like a loser girlfriend..
cos my boyfriend cooks better than me.)
but after thinking about the whole thing...
it was actually kinda sweet inside.
and i like that feeling.


saya cinta kamu sayang!
thank you for everything!
every day, every hour, every minute and every second
we spend together, i shall not forget!

he ended up coming all the way back to see what i did
for him.
wakaka. =))
and please don't watch 'love wrecked'.
it's a stupid show.

that's all for today.
a day that will be in my heart for a very very long time.
so, do something sweet for your loved ones!
your boy/girlfriend.. your friends.. or even your mum!
though she might me naggy.
but she deserves it.
don'cha think?
so.. go ahead!
and adios!

oh.
and this month, i recieved a lily!

my relationship with my dad was never well since
i was primary 3.
i saw him slap my sis right in her face just cos of a
small matter and totally got scared of him.
and i started to have a grudge against him cos he
slapped my mum during primary 5.
he hated people being naggy.
but what my mum did was for his own good.
she was stopping him from eating sweet pastries at
night cos he's diabetic.
and there he goes.
i cried.
and my mum screamed in his face calling him to get
out of the house.
damn...
that day was hell...

but i still loved him.
and nothing else.

he was the only fear i have at home.
cos when he open his mouth to speak, my heart would
sense 99% trouble.
words from his mouth will never be normal things i hear.
it will either make me feel ultra hurt or ultra encouraged.
but most of the time it's the bad one.
not because of he likes to, but because he loves me.

he never showed his softer side.
maybe he didn't know how to.
till now i still don't know who he really is.
what is his heart like?
i don't know.
and i don't dare to.

i'm scared of you, dad...
although i see you everyday, i feel like you're not
here at all.
it's been long since i felt a dad's love.
very long.
i miss you dad.

to samantha:

i had already forgiven you a long long time ago.
it's alright.
don't cry.
cause sometimes it's harder to forgive yourself than
to forgive others.
chances are out there.
you just didn't know.
plus... you didn't even give yourself a chance to.
so, smile.
= )

this feeling sucks totally pls.
i DISLIKE being bossed around.
i HATE that feeling of being told on what to do.
espcially when it comes to studies.
mum and teachers and those who really care....
pleaseeeeee..
stop it.
i've had enough.
the more you stress me, the more i wanna rebel.
cos when i'm stressed, I CAN'T STUDY.
i'll be day dreaming away.
i hope someone tells them this.
i know you people care.
but all those words just doesn't work on me.
i'm sorry.

i'm amazed.
very amazed, at how a person can actually be so
nice during our presence and talk bad about us
behind our backs just because he wants to show
the girl he loves dearly that he only cares about her.
and then infront of us, he'll talk bad about how bad
the girl is treating him.
we used to listen to his rants.
but i'm sick and tired.. VERY tired.
and i don't wanna care anymore.

yesterday was NOT my morning.
i woke up with difficulties.
i couldn't open my eyes cos they seem to weigh 50 lbs.
darling even had to call my house phone when i didn't
pick up his calls for 6-7 times just to wake me up.
went to khatib and sat his dad's car to school.
i was so tired that i slept for more than half the journey.
reached school and found out that i've got detention
to do after school cos i didn't attend AU 3 weeks ago.
and my mood went all the way low low low.
i've got plans after school pls!
i need quality time with my boyfriend la!
and i was gonna buy the jacket i want!
plus that was 3 weeks ago!
can't they say it earlier?!
gowri and i went to find mrs chong.
and you know what?
she gave us bullshit pls.
totally nagging at us like we're in fault.
we didn't even know there's au on that day.
besides we've got make-up P.E.
YES! my school's got make-up P.E!
DISGUSTING i know!
i hate last minute stuff. especially when it comes to
staying back after school.
we ended up going for it.
as for my jacket, darling went all the way to orchard
himself to buy it for me.
and that brightened up my day.
alot.
and that silly wanted to lie to me that the jacket's
out of stock and he didn't manage to buy it.
but he failed though.
cos i know him too well. xD
but that surely brightened up my day!
neeheehee.

love you darling!
you never fail to make my bad day a good one.
you're the bestest boyfriend and bestfriend!

ok... enough complaining about my yerterday.
shall blog later.
ADIOS SUCKERS! xDD

i've been missing you for quite some time.
and now that you're leaving, i guess i'm gonna miss
you so much more.
those memories would definitely stay.
but must you go?

all of a sudden i feel so afraid.
i don't know why.
i can't describe these feelings i'm having..
but i'm gonna cry...
soon.
very soon...


must you go?

yesterday was totally studying for me.
and i'm quite satisfied with myself.
*pats own head*
i managed to learn the whole topic by myself.
and that wasn't difficult at all.
maybe it's the change of attitude.
or MAYBE the teacher made it extra easy
to understand.
whatever it is, anyone can do it.
but it depends on the will to learn.
erm, i guess.

ohkay...
i realised that people have been watching movies lately.
especially click and the lake house.
and when was the last time i stepped into a cinema?
ok let's not talk about this.
anyways the main thing i wanna talk about is that
do you guys actually know that 'the lake house' is
not an original movie?
the storyline was copied from a korean movie called
'il mare' which wasn't that popular when it came out in
the cinemas a few years back..
and the scenes are almost totally the same.
oh. and better not let bestie read this cos she's like
a korean fan or smth.
and she will go 'ya loh ya loh! copycat la!' NON-STOP.

GAHHH!!
a sudden urge to fly to orchard road and shop!
but must wait. =(((

happy birthday to my bestfriend!
TAY SIM EE!!!!
i love you and you know that!



sometimes i really wonder what are those complains for.
it's really unecessary.
but some people just chose to think that people actually
do care about their nonsense.

sayang and i were boarding this double-deckered
bus yesterday and it was hell packed with aunties and
ah mas prolly cos they are alighting soon or is because
you know the problem why old people can't move
that well.
there's a couple infront of us and they both tapped.
but the bus driver didn't see the girl tap,
so he said politely 'excuse me. can tap awhile?'
the girl was puzzled.
then her bf said loudly 'tap let him see la!'.
then she did it willingly.
the problem is with the boyfriend.
he continued blabbering about the driver without
even noticing how ashamed his girlfriend was.
everyone was looking at them the whole time la.
what a pity.




sometimes it's not what you say that makes people
hate or dislike you.
it's what they chose to listen and belief.

HOLLAAAAA!!
ya... ya... i know...
finally someone's bloggin..
BUT! i have a reason!
i've been busy!
and that's valid ohkay?!
ya la ya la...

hennyways!
my life has taken another route!
not something i want cos there's no time for
shopping and enjoying.
but for a better future, i decided to try making
friends with work, work and work!
don't be shy, say hi!

i'm really starting to feel the stress.
the desperate feeling of getting hold of something i
really want.
and it's quite a good start.
for me i mean.
cos i'm not those kinda people who doesn't need much
brain cells to get an A.
furthermore... i've been saying that i'll work hard again
and again...[even before o levels please.]
and i still got nuts from myself.
but at least i've started...
and it won't end till i get my u-cert.
looks like a race with time.

i've deleted some posts from my blog.
it's not that i'm feeling guilty or anything cos
apparently i did nothing wrong.
but its because i feel that those are just plain
childishness.
sometimes it's just a misunderstanding not cleared.
if you really hate me, try talking to me nicely..
i'll explain..
but if i'm wrong, i'll admit and sincerely apologise,
hoping for forgiveness.
but whatever is misunderstood, i've already forgiven.
= DDD

that's all i wanna say for now.
shall blog again soon.
wee!